My First date success or failure?

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Hello everyone – I am happy to announce that I had my first date. We met at a funky little coffee shop, not the average Starbucks.

I normally don’t like when people only post one profile picture, but I could tell through our communication that she was different and defiantly real. I was happy to meet her for a coffee. We seemed to hit things off well. She had her back up text come in but still stayed so I was comfortable in knowing that she wasn’t just going to blow me off.

Our conversations flourished and I shared something that I’m comfortable sharing with people I trust. As she admits to sharing something that she does not share with everyone. I went in without a plan, and I did not follow Brad’s guide on how to handle a date. I didn’t give her a time I had to leave, and I just let the conversation flow where it wanted to. We ended up talking for an hour and a half. It only felt like minutes to me. meaning I enjoyed the conversation.

She asked what time it was and seemed surprised that an hour and a half went by. We decided to end the meeting, and we both agreed to meet again.

I last spoke to her a week ago, and my gut is telling me that she is not going to contact me again. Her last words were “I’ll be in touch” to me that’s the kiss of death. We were going to meet again and unfortunately, I had to back out…after that… things went south.

So me being me, I’m not going to lay the blame on anyone. I just say it wasn’t meant to be. There are plenty of fish in the sea so to speak. Stay tuned to see if I can get past a first date next time. All in all, I would say my first date/experience was good and positive. I would definitely not say it was a failure, only a learning experience.

 

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About the Author:

Mike is returning to online dating after being away from dating for many years. While not an "expert", Mike brings a real view of the challenges of online dating and his opinions in dealing with those challenges.

Comments

  1. Greg Dean  August 22, 2017

    Hey, great story and really good honesty.

    Mostly, no matter how may ever contemplate it is your fault or there is something wrong with you, mostly it is the opposite.

    You live in a society that is heavily feminist. As such, women are EXPECTING that men well above their own station in life should, by right, be attracted to them. A large woman might not date a guy who is not a foot taller than her for example, regardless of whether that type of guy would typically be attracted to a woman of that size.

    One handy bro tip I have when women begin to back off, is to tell her upfront or even in an SMS after, “This is not an interview. This is a fun date with no obligations. Friends first and let’s hang out if bored. Don’t rate me on our first date and I won’t rate you either. We can always start from scratch as easy friends and if nothing develops, who cares? We have a new cool friend”.

    Women will put too much pressure on that one date and make auto judgments within seconds that will wipe out the rest of the date.

    So no stress. You can SMS her again, and just be honest with her and say what I wrote above. Remove the pressure. She thinks you want sex from her. Maybe you do. But maybe you just want to not be rejected and feel that frustration. Meanwhile, she is single single and looking and nothing will meet her standards that she has been sold as a lie.

    Take the pressure off you both and go in fun and funny always and ensure she knows you are just happy to hand out and talk about life.

  2. Weddinginn  September 22, 2017

    Firstly, i just want to congratulate you on your first date. I think, it was not your fault, some girls may feel and react like she does with you. Keep calm, if she is not returned in some days, make another friends and enjoy your life.