Online Dating Blog

It’s a big move to make your online dating profile inactive or cancel your account. And hopefully, it’s a task that comes with great joy, knowing that you’ve met someone who really clicks, so much so that you have no interest in continuing your search for the right person. You may have found him/her! The best-case scenario is when you are able to cancel your account with absolute certainty that you have found the one or at least someone who has serious potential to become “the one” and you recognize that you just need to give the relationship the attention and time it needs to develop.

However, it’s not that easy for everyone. Sometimes this realization warms up to you slowly, like forgetting to pre-heat your car in a winter storm and you’re driving down the road when it hits you that the inside of your car suddenly feels like a sweltering desert. When this realization is delayed and it’s not mutual, your significant other may become distressed and move on, so here are a few signs to consider as you navigate this tricky terrain.

Have you moved your conversations offline and are in touch on a weekly (or more) basis? If yes, this relationship is headed in the right direction. If no, and you would like to move beyond contacting one another through your online dating service, you should suggest exchanging numbers and making plans offline to see how the other person responds.

Are you frequently texting, calling or checking your phone for a message from this person? If yes, then this person may be worth canceling any upcoming dates you have with others and hiding your online dating profile so that you’re no longer “out there”. If no, maybe you’re not looking for a serious relationship, or this person isn’t who you’re looking for. Just be sensitive to the other person’s feelings and expectations and let him/her know where you stand.

Are you still looking for and scheduling dates through your online dating service? If no, then you’re ready for some exclusivity and now would be a good time to have a conversation with this person to see if they’re in agreement. If you’re still pursuing other dates and your online dating profile remains active even though you’re really into this person, you should decide if the comfort of not making any changes is worth loosing this person over. Because if you’re still looking for and dating others, the other person is free to do the same and someone might just come along and be ready to make the commitment that you weren’t sure you wanted.

Are you considering inviting this person to spend a holiday with you or as a date for a special occasion? This question can be tough to answer honestly because sometimes the thought of spending a holiday alone or going to a special event solo can be enough to lower your expectations. But if this person really isn’t who you’re looking for, it may be unfair to send a mixed message by inviting him/her to such a status-changing event.

If you’re still not sure, why not just hide your profile? That way, you won’t be visible on the online dating service, and if the relationship doesn’t work out, you can put your profile back up without any hassle of renewing your account. If you hide your profile and things are still going well by the time your account renewal comes around, you’re probably already exclusive, or you should be. So if you haven’t yet, it’s time to have that conversation with your significant other and see where the relationship goes.

A healthy relationship needs time and space to grow. If you sense there is real potential there, don’t risk ruining it by sending signals that you’re not interested in commitment. Becoming exclusive doesn’t mean that you’re throwing away your freedom to ever be single again; you’re just giving the relationship the potential to thrive. And if it doesn’t work out, at least you can say you tried and you’re all the more experienced as you get back into the dating game.